Friday, September 12, 2008

Aerobics in Uganda

A couple of friends and I have decided to start taking an aerobics class. It is always entertaining. The class is mixed with Ugandans and westerners. The music is always funny mixes and the instructor speeds them up so they all sound like Mickey Mouse. It is a mixer of Ugandan local and international dance music. Unfortunately most of the experiences fall under "you had to be there" but here are some things that we as a collective have experienced or seen.

1. An instructor with a huge belly coming into the workout room, dropping his pants turning around to give a full Monty view before changing into his sweat pants. I am not sure if this is to inspire us to run... mostly out of the class room.
2. Ugandan men flailing their arms around trying to keep up with the instructor with zero rhythm and doing their own unique steps. Thus destroying the myth that all Africans have rhythm.
3. The instructor flirting so much with the Ugandan girl who contorts her body in strange directions with every move she makes. I don’t know how she twists and turns like that without breaking her back. But I want to tell them to go in the back an just do whatever it is they need to do so we can focus on class.
4. The mother daughter duo who always lay down about fifteen minutes into class.
5. The ancient Ugandan man who has a phobia of using the step during step class. He prefers to run in place and kick at random intervals. Always moving in the opposite direction as the rest of us. Often almost kicking me as he seems to always take up residence beside me.
6. The instructor (the pants dropper) who insisted on using our "steps" at the same time that we were using them. When this happened to both Christine and I we stopped but he encouraged us to continue. But really neither of us wanted him to fling sweat onto us. This also falls under the category of please give me my personal space. (We have never been back on a Sunday)
7. During every class there are very large men who come by and watch the class donned in blue sheets nice and wet from the steam room leaving little to the imagination.
8. Our instructor doesn’t know how to count often he calls out 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 2, reverse. Of course it took us a month to figure out what he was saying. Or one more five more. Doesn’t he know if it is only one more he can’t ask us to do five more and then make us do three? But he always thanks us for our excellent work and for trying.
9. Flailing arm man wears very interesting work out outfit last week he had on a bright red t-shirt tucked into blue swim trunks while wearing trainers and black dress socks.
10. The instructor will randomly stop class and give us a break for 2 minute break so he can go and change out of his pants and into shorts because he has sweat so much. During this time my motivation disappears with my heart rate.
11. More often than not the entire class gets lost as the instructor switches to advanced mode adding twists and turns.
12. Mosquitoes manage to stay away during "cardio" section of class but swarm by your legs and head when you are trying to do crunches. You know you will be eaten alive if you notice them swarming when you are jumping around with your arms flailing.

All in all in we have a great time and everyone tries really hard and we are always enthusiastic it is just sometimes difficult not burst out laughing in class although sometimes that laughter is what keeps us going! We are aggressively attempting to get some video of this so you can experience it first hand.

--Renee and Beth

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